Many young children are picky eaters but that doesn’t necessarily mean they will develop a vitamin or mineral deficiency. Children don’t need large amounts of vitamins and minerals. In addition, many foods that children eat are fortified with important vitamins and minerals. So your child may be getting more vitamins and minerals than you think.

When is a multivitamin necessary? Talk to your child’s doctor. If your doctor is concerned that your son isn’t getting the recommended amounts of vitamins and minerals, he or she may recommend a daily multivitamin. However, giving your child a multivitamin can’t replace proper nutrition.

Keep in mind that certain vitamins and minerals can be toxic if taken in large amounts. To prevent your child from getting too much of any one vitamin or mineral, choose a multivitamin specifically made for children, not for adults. Also, keep multivitamins out of reach of children.

An adult should always dispense vitamin and mineral supplements — even if a child seems responsible enough to do so. Although some multivitamins for children come in the form of gum or candy, it is important to teach your child that a multivitamin is medicine — and not candy.

One vitamin that has been in the spotlight lately is vitamin D. Some research shows that vitamin D deficiency is not uncommon in the United States, and vitamin D deficiency has a very negative impact on bone development in children. For this reason, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends a daily multivitamin with at least 200 international units (IUs) of vitamin D if a child:

• Does not get regular exposure to sunlight
• Does not drink at least 17 ounces (500 milliliters) of vitamin D-fortified milk, juice or soy milk daily
• Follows a vegetarian diet

Source: Mayo Clinic

It’s estimated that three to six of every 1,000 children have autism. A recent increase in the number of autism cases in the United States may be the result of improved diagnosis and changes in diagnostic criteria.

The disorder occurs three to four times more often in boys than in girls. The severity of symptoms is variable. Some children with autism will grow up able to live independently, while others may always need supportive living and working environments.

The cause of autism isn’t clear, and there’s no cure. But intensive, early treatment can make a difference.

Signs and symptoms
In general, children with autism have problems in three crucial areas of development — social skills, language and behavior. The most severe autism is marked by a complete inability to communicate or interact with other people.

Because the symptoms of autism vary widely, two children with the same diagnosis may act quite differently and have strikingly different skills.

If your child has autism, he or she may develop normally for the first few months — or years — of life and then later become less responsive to other people, including you. You may recognize the following signs in the areas of social skills, language and behavior:

Social skills

• Fails to respond to his or her name
• Has poor eye contact
• Appears not to hear you at times
• Resists cuddling and holding
• Appears unaware of others’ feelings
• Seems to prefer playing alone — retreats into his or her “own world”

Language

• Starts talking later than other children
• Loses previously acquired ability to say words or sentences
• Does not make eye contact when making requests
• Speaks with an abnormal tone or rhythm — may use a singsong voice or robot-like speech
• Can’t start a conversation or keep one going
• May repeat words or phrases verbatim, but doesn’t understand how to use them

Behavior

• Performs repetitive movements, such as rocking, spinning or hand-flapping
• Develops specific routines or rituals
• Becomes disturbed at the slightest change in routines or rituals
• Moves constantly
• May be fascinated by parts of an object, such as the spinning wheels of a toy car
• May be unusually sensitive to light, sound and touch

Young children with autism also have a hard time sharing experiences with others. When someone reads to them, for example, they’re unlikely to point at pictures in the book. This early-developing social skill is crucial to later language and social development.

As they mature, some children with autism become more engaged with others and show less marked disturbances in behavior. Some, usually those with the least severe impairments, eventually may lead normal or near-normal lives. Others, however, continue to have severe impairments in language or social skills, and the adolescent years can mean a worsening of behavior problems.

The majority of children with autism are slow to acquire new knowledge or skills. However, some children with autism have normal to high intelligence. These children learn quickly yet have trouble communicating, applying what they know in everyday life and adjusting in social situations. An extremely small number of children with autism are “autistic savants” and have exceptional skills in a specific area, such as art or math.

Causes
Autism has no single, identifiable cause. The disorder seems to be related to abnormalities in several regions of the brain. Researchers have identified a number of gene defects associated with autism.

Families with one autistic child have a one in 20 chance of having a second child with the disorder. In some cases, relatives of autistic children show mild impairments in social and communication skills or engage in repetitive behaviors.

Children with symptoms of autism have a higher than normal risk of also having:

• Fragile X syndrome, which causes mental retardation
• Tuberous sclerosis, in which tumors grow in the brain
• Tourette’s syndrome
• Epilepsy

Some people believe autism is caused by vaccines — particularly the measles-mumps-rubella vaccine (MMR), as well as vaccines containing thimerosal, a preservative that contains a very small amount of mercury. But extensive studies have shown no link between vaccines and autism.

When to seek medical advice
Babies develop at their own pace, and many don’t follow exact timelines found in some parenting books. But children with autism usually show some signs of delayed development by 18 months. If you suspect that your child may have autism, discuss your concerns with your doctor. The earlier treatment begins, the more effective it will be.

Your doctor may recommend further evaluation if your child:

• Doesn’t babble or coo by 12 months
• Doesn’t gesture — such as point or wave — by 12 months
• Doesn’t say single words by 16 months
• Doesn’t say two-word phrases by 24 months
• Loses previously acquired language or social skills at any age

Screening and diagnosis
Your child’s doctor will look for signs of developmental delays at regular checkups. If your child shows some signs of autism, you may be referred to a specialist in treating children with autism. This specialist, working with a team of professionals, can perform a formal evaluation for the disorder.

Because autism varies widely in severity and manifestations, making a diagnosis may be difficult. There isn’t a medical test to pinpoint the disorder. Instead, a formal evaluation consists of observing your child and talking to you about how your child’s social skills, language skills and behavior have developed and changed over time. To help reach a diagnosis, your child may undergo a number of developmental tests covering speech, language and psychological issues.

Although the signs of autism often appear by 18 months, the diagnosis sometimes isn’t made until age 2 or 3, when there may be more obvious delays in language development. Early diagnosis is important because early intervention — preferably before age 3 — seems to be associated with the best chance for significant improvement.

Treatment
There’s no cure for autism, and there’s no “one-size-fits-all” treatment. In fact, the range of home-based and school-based treatments and interventions for autism can be overwhelming. Your doctor can help identify resources in your area that may work for your child. Treatment options may include:

• Behavioral and communication therapies. Many programs have been developed to address the range of social, language and behavioral difficulties associated with autism. Some programs focus on reducing problem behaviors and teaching new skills. Other programs focus on teaching children how to act in social situations or how to communicate better with other people.
• Drug therapies. Right now, there are no medications that directly improve the core signs of autism. But some medications can help control symptoms. Stimulants can help with hyperactivity, while antipsychotic drugs sometimes will control repetitive and aggressive behaviors.
• Complementary approaches. Some parents choose to supplement educational and medical intervention with complementary therapies, such as art therapy, music therapy, special diets, vitamin and mineral supplements, and sensory integration — which focuses on reducing a child’s hypersensitivity to touch or sound. However, there is no scientific proof that these therapies work. It’s important to talk with your child’s doctor before trying any treatment.

Children with autism often respond well to highly structured education programs. Successful programs often include a team of specialists and a variety of activities to improve social skills, communication and behavior.

A child won’t “outgrow” autism. But he or she can learn to function within the confines of the disorder, especially if treatment begins early. Preschool children who receive intensive, individualized behavioral interventions show good progress.

Coping skills
Raising a child with autism can be physically exhausting and emotionally draining. These ideas may help:

• Find a team of trusted professionals. You’ll need to make important decisions about your child’s education and treatment. Find a team of teachers and therapists who can help evaluate the options in your area and explain the federal regulations regarding children with disabilities. Make sure this team includes a case manager or service coordinator, who can help access financial services and government programs.
• Take time for yourself and other family members. Caring for a child with autism can be a round-the-clock job that puts stress on your marriage and your whole family. To avoid burnout, take time out to relax, exercise or enjoy your favorite activities. Try to schedule one-on-one time with your other children and plan date nights with your spouse — even if it’s just watching a movie together after the children go to bed.
• Seek out other families of autistic children. Other families struggling with the challenges of autism can be a source of useful advice. Many communities have support groups for parents and siblings of children with autism.
• Learn about the disorder. There are many myths and misconceptions about autism. Learning the truth can help you better understand your child and his or her attempts to communicate. With time, you’ll likely be rewarded by seeing your child grow and learn and even show affection — in his or her own way.

Source: Mayo Clinic

Snacking is a major pastime for many American children — so much so that nearly one-fourth of kids’ daily energy intake comes from nibbling between meals.

Much of this nibbling is on prepackaged snack foods, which are high in calories and low in nutrients. The popularity of these fattening treats may be one of the factors responsible for the country’s childhood-obesity epidemic.

But snacking itself isn’t necessarily bad. The content of your child’s snacks is what’s most important. Providing healthy snack choices now will help your children learn to make healthy food choices in the future.

Snacks are essential
Young children actually need snacks. Their stomachs are small, so they often can’t get all the nutrients they need in a day through meals alone. They need smaller portions of food more often. A good rule of thumb for toddler serving sizes is about 1 tablespoon of food for each year of age. You can always give them more if they’re still hungry.

Children’s growth rates slow down after their first birthday. Because they need fewer calories at this time, they tend to eat less. Continue to provide healthy food choices for meals and snacks. Don’t get upset or force children to clean their plates.

Certain foods may cause choking in younger children. Avoid feeding raw vegetables, popcorn, nuts or peanuts, and dried fruits — such as raisins — to children under 3. Quarter hot dogs lengthwise and then cut into small pieces. Slice grapes in half.

Don’t spoil your dinner
Children who attend child care may not be hungry at the family mealtime if their caregivers serve them a late afternoon snack. Consider asking your child care provider to not offer a snack too late. If your child is frequently in child care until 6 p.m. or later, you may even pack an evening meal for him or her to eat at 4:30 p.m., before going home. Then your child can have a healthy snack at home during the family dinnertime.

Fruit juice: Friend or foe?
Children often prefer fruit juice to water or fresh fruit because juice tastes better to them. And many parents see no problem with allowing their children to drink almost unlimited amounts juice, since juice is promoted as a good source of nutrition.

Although juice does contain some healthy nutrients, it’s high in calories and it may contribute to weight gain and tooth decay if consumed in excess. Some juice drinks, even those with 100 percent juice, have more calories than sugary carbonated beverages do. Juice also lacks the healthy fiber that whole fruit has.

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that children drink no more than two 6-ounce servings of fruit juice a day. Consider juices fortified with calcium, especially if your child shies away from milk and dairy products.

Sugar attacks teeth
Sugary snacks, including sugared soft drinks and fruit juices, can cause cavities. Bacteria in the mouth convert sugar to a type of acid that eats away at tooth enamel. This acid continues to damage teeth for at least 20 minutes.

Gooey and sticky sweets usually result in the most damage because they spend more time in your mouth. Allowing toddlers to sip juice all day long gives their teeth a sugar bath that lasts the entire day.

Expanding choices
Once children begin attending school, their food options expand beyond what you choose to buy at the grocery store. But you still have some control over what’s in the refrigerator for their after-school snack. They’ll typically grab whatever’s close and easy.

If cookies are available, they’ll eat cookies. If there are no cookies, fresh fruits and raw vegetables will sound much more appealing. Try to have a selection of vegetables already cut up and ready to eat in the refrigerator.

Other healthy choices may include:

• Microwave popcorn
• Low-fat or fat-free milk, cheese or yogurt
• Low-sugar, whole-grain cereals

Sugar-filled beverages
Keep an eye on what your children are drinking as well. By the age of 14, a third of American girls and more than half the boys are drinking at least three 8-ounce servings of sweetened soft drinks daily.

When checking the sugar and calorie contents on soft drinks, keep in mind that every 20-ounce bottle contains 2.5 servings. That means a soft drink that contains 100 calories per serving provides you with 250 calories if you drink the entire bottle.

Nutrition labels: Reading between the lines
You’ve probably seen a lot of food products labeled low-fat, reduced-fat, reduced-calorie, light, sugar-free or fat-free. Be careful when evaluating these nutrition claims, and check the nutrition label to find out the whole story.

Sometimes what appears to be healthy really isn’t. For example, foods marketed as low-fat or fat-free can still be high in calories, and most snack foods are naturally “cholesterol-free,” but they can still be very high in fat, saturated fat and sugar.

Combat TV ads
Kids may clamor for the latest fad snack food, especially if they see it advertised on television. Limiting the number of hours your children watch TV can reduce your children’s exposure to these ads. It may also help reduce their risk of obesity.

Children who watch more than five hours of television a day are more than four times as likely to be obese as those watching less than two hours a day. Children typically become more physically active when parents limit recreational screen time — including televisions, computers and video games — to no more than two hours a day.

Eating in front of the television is a bad habit for any age group. People tend to eat much more than they realize during these episodes of mindless munching.

Snack-time tips
It’s not always easy to persuade your children to eat healthy snacks. Try experimenting with the following techniques to promote snack-time health:

• Offer similar choices. For example, don’t say: “Do you want ice cream or do you want pretzels?” Instead, offer comparable choices, such as regular or frozen yogurt, celery or carrots, graham crackers or soda crackers, apples or oranges.
• Provide variety. Select snacks from a variety of food groups. If you serve the same snacks repeatedly, your children might get bored and ask for unhealthy snacks instead.
• Be creative. Dress up fruits and vegetables for maximum appeal. Prepare celery with peanut butter, for example, or carrots with low-fat dip. Offer crackers with several varieties of cheeses. Cut vegetables in different ways to make them visually interesting.

Healthy eating
Don’t forget to be a good role model for your children. You can’t expect them to be content with broccoli and low-fat milk when you’re washing down your potato chips with a quart of sugary carbonation.

Your children’s snacking habits aren’t going to change overnight, but look for positive changes over weeks and months. Teaching your children to make healthy snack choices today will reap your whole family an entire lifetime of benefits.

Source: Mayo Clinic

You may walk on eggshells around your child with oppositional defiant disorder, not knowing what may trigger a tantrum or argument. While this is one of the most difficult of behavioral disorders, setting firm boundaries with consistent consequences plus a commitment to improving your relationship with your child can help your family overcome the dominating grip that oppositional defiant disorder may have on your household.

The foundation of treatment of ODD is behavioral management. Parents don’t have to go it alone in trying to manage a child with oppositional defiant disorder. Doctors, counselors and child development experts can help you learn specific parenting strategies and use proven techniques to help build a foundation of trust between you and your child and improve the underlying basis for these disruptive behaviors.

Signs and symptoms
It may be tough at times to recognize the difference between a strong-willed or emotional child and a child who has oppositional defiant disorder. And certainly there is a range between the normal independence-seeking behavior of children and oppositional defiant disorder. It’s normal for children to exhibit oppositional behaviors at certain stages of their development. However, if your child’s oppositional behaviors are persistent, have lasted at least six months and are clearly disruptive to the family and home or school environment, the issue may be oppositional defiant disorder.

The following are behaviors associated with ODD:

• Negativity
• Defiance
• Disobedience
• Hostility directed toward authority figures

These behaviors might cause your child to regularly and consistently show these symptoms:

• Frequent temper tantrums
• Argumentativeness with adults
• Refusal to comply with adult requests or rules
• Deliberate annoyance of other people
• Blaming others for mistakes or misbehavior
• Acting touchy and easily annoyed
• Anger and resentment
• Spiteful or vindictive behavior
• Aggressiveness toward peers

Oppositional defiant disorder often occurs along with other behavioral or mental health problems such as attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), anxiety or depression. The symptoms of ODD may be hard to distinguish from those of other behavioral or mental health problems.

Causes
There’s no clear cause underpinning oppositional defiant disorder. Contributing causes may include:

• The child’s inherent temperament
• The family’s response to the child’s style
• A genetic component that when coupled with certain environmental conditions, such as lack of supervision, poor quality daycare or family instability, increases the risk for ODD
• A biochemical or neurological factor
• The child’s perception that he or she isn’t getting enough of the parent’s time and attention

Risk factors
A number of factors play a role in the development of oppositional defiant disorder. ODD is a complex problem involving a variety of influences, circumstances and genetic components. No single factor alone causes ODD; however, the more risk factors a child has for ODD, the greater the risk for developing the disorder. Possible risk factors include:

• Having a parent with a mood or substance abuse disorder
• Being abused or neglected
• Harsh or inconsistent discipline
• Lack of supervision
• Poor relationship with one or both parents
• Family instability such as multiple moves, changing schools frequently
• Parents with a history of ADHD, oppositional defiant disorder or conduct problems
• Financial problems in the family
• Peer rejection
• Exposure to violence
• Frequent changes in daycare providers
• Parents who have a troubled marriage or are divorced

When to seek medical advice
If you’re concerned about your child’s behavior or your own ability to parent a challenging child, seek help from your doctor, a child psychologist or child behavioral expert. Your primary care doctor or your child’s pediatrician can refer you to someone.

The earlier this disorder can be managed, the better the chances are for reversing its effects on your child and your family. Treatment can help restore your child’s self-esteem and rebuild a positive relationship between you and your child.

Screening and diagnosis
Doctors usually diagnose oppositional defiant disorder through information supplied by parents and teachers. It can be difficult for doctors to sort and exclude other associated disorders — for example, attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder versus oppositional defiant disorder.

Behavioral and mental health conditions are difficult to definitively diagnose. There’s no blood test or imaging technique that can pinpoint an exact cause of behavioral symptoms, though these tests are sometimes used to rule out certain conditions. Physicians and other health professionals rely on their clinical judgment and experience, information gathered from parents and teachers who may fill out questionnaires, and possibly from interviewing the child.

Complications
Many children with oppositional defiant disorder have other treatable conditions such as ADHD, depression and anxiety. If these conditions are left untreated, managing ODD can be very difficult for the parents, and frustrating for the affected child. Kids with oppositional defiant disorder may have trouble in school with teachers and other authority figures and may struggle to make friends.

ODD may be a precursor to other, more severe behavioral disorders such as conduct disorder, but this is controversial.

Treatment
Oppositional defiant disorder is not something your child can overcome on his or her own, nor can it be solved with medication, herbal supplements, vitamins or a special diet. Successful treatment of oppositional defiant disorder requires commitment and follow-through by you as parents and others involved in your child’s care. But most important in treatment is for you to show consistent, unconditional love and acceptance of your child — even during difficult and disruptive situations. Doing so can be tough for even the most patient parents.

Ideally, treatment for oppositional defiant disorder involves your primary care doctor and a qualified mental health or child development professional. These health professionals can screen for and treat other mental health problems that may be interfering with oppositional defiant disorder, such as ADHD, anxiety or depression. Successful treatment of the often co-existing conditions will improve the effectiveness of treatment for ODD. In some cases, the symptoms of ODD disappear entirely.

A mental health professional can help you learn or strengthen specific skills and parenting techniques to help improve your child’s behavior and strengthen your relationship with him or her. For example, you can learn how to:

• Give effective time-outs
• Avoid power struggles
• Remain calm and unemotional in the face of opposition
• Recognize and praise your child’s good behaviors and positive characteristics
• Offer acceptable choices to your child, giving him or her a certain amount of control

Although some parent management techniques may seem like common sense, learning to use them in the face of opposition isn’t easy, especially if there are other stressors at home. Learning these skills may require counseling, parenting classes or other forms of education, and consistent practice and patience. At first, your child is not likely to be cooperative or to appreciate your changed response to his or her behavior. Expect that you’ll have set backs and relapses, and be prepared with a plan to manage those times.

Individual counseling for your child may help him or her learn to manage anger. Family counseling may help improve communication and relationships and help family members learn how to work together. Again, it’s crucial to identify and treat any other disorders that may be affecting your child along with oppositional defiant disorder.

Self-care
At home, you can begin chipping away at problem behaviors by practicing the following.

• Recognize and praise your child’s positive behaviors
• Model the behavior you want your child to have
• Pick your battles
• Set limits and enforce consistent reasonable consequences
• Develop a consistent daily schedule for your child
• Work with your spouse or others in your household to assure consistent and appropriate discipline procedures
• Assign your child a household chore that is essential and that won’t get done unless the child does it

Coping skills
For yourself, counseling can provide an outlet for your own mental health concerns that could interfere with the successful treatment of your child’s symptoms. A depressed or anxious parent may disengage from his or her child, and that can trigger or worsen oppositional behaviors.

• Learn ways to calm yourself. Keeping your own cool models the behavior you want from your child.
• Take time for yourself. Develop outside interests, get some exercise and spend some time away from your child to restore your energy.
• Be forgiving. Let go of things that you or your child did in the past. Start each day with a fresh outlook and a clean slate.

Source: Mayo Clinic

Is your child’s nutrition — or lack thereof — about to drive you to distraction? Children’s nutrition creates worry for many parents. Fortunately, picky eaters can get the nutrition they need.

Consider this scenario: Your preschooler has refused to eat anything other than peanut butter sandwiches for every meal and snack for the past two days. Your toddler, on the other hand, wants nothing at all during meals. You can barely drag her away from her toys to sit at the dinner table.

Young children become picky eaters for a variety of reasons. Understanding what may be behind this behavior can make it less frustrating for parents. It can also provide clues to what strategies might help you cope with the behavior. If your child’s picky eating is actually compromising his or her growth and development, the same understanding can suggest tips for better child nutrition.

Slower growth reduces appetite
After the age of 2, your child’s growth rate slows dramatically. Babies typically quadruple their birth weight by the time they turn 2. But between the ages of 2 and 5, children gain only 4 to 5 pounds each year.

Young children tend to eat only when they’re hungry. A parent’s job is to provide several different types of nutritious food at every meal and snack. Your child will make decisions on whether to eat, what to eat and how much to eat, though you can help guide this process.

Tiny tummies hold less food
A young child’s stomach is only about the size of his or her fist. That’s why small but frequent feedings work best. Prohibit snacking for one hour before meals so that your child can come to the table hungry and motivated to eat.

Toddlers and preschoolers often can fill up on milk or juice, and simply have no room for a wider variety of foods. Some juice products — even those containing 100 percent juice — provide more sugar and calories than sugared sodas do.

Doctors recommend that juice be limited to less than 6 ounces a day. The United States Department of Agriculture’s new dietary guidelines, issued in 2005, recommend that children ages 2 to 8 consume 2 cups of low-fat milk products a day.

Terrible 2s want control
As toddlers begin asserting their independence, the dinner table can become a battleground. It can be helpful to give them some control over the situation by providing only small portions, so they can finish them and then ask for more. A good rule of thumb is 1 tablespoon per each year of your child’s age.

Don’t force children to clean their plates. Threats and punishments only reinforce the power struggle. Don’t appear overly concerned about what does and doesn’t get eaten. Over the course of a week, most children get plenty of variety and nutrition in their diets. If your child is energetic and growing, he or she is doing fine.

How to introduce new foods
Introduce a new food in a neutral manner. Talk about the food’s color, shape, size, aroma and texture — but not about whether it tastes good. Be patient with your child’s investigative habits. Young children often touch or smell new foods, and may even put tiny bits in their mouths and then take them back out again.

Children often need at least 10 exposures to a new food before they accept it, so be persistent. Try these tips:

• Start small. Begin by placing a small portion of the new food on your child’s plate next to familiar foods. And remember — new foods will seem more appealing at meals if your child hasn’t just finished a snack.
• Make it fun. Sometimes children will try a new food if it’s fun to eat. For example, serve broccoli with a favorite dip or sauce. Cut foods with solid textures into various shapes with cookie cutters.
• Involve your child. At the grocery store, let your child help select new fruits, vegetables, whole grain items and yogurt flavors for the whole family to try. At home, involve your child in food preparation.
• Be a good example. Children often mimic their parents. The more frequently you eat a particular food, the more likely your child will be to eventually try it.

Mixing and unmixing
If you want your child to eat more vegetables, you might add them into familiar foods. For example, you could add broccoli to macaroni and cheese, or mix grated zucchini and carrots into muffins, meatloaf and soups.

In some cases, you may have better success if you “unmix” the food. Many children prefer to eat the ingredients of a salad or sandwich separately.

Routines are helpful
Young children feel more comfortable with predictable routines. Bedtime routines help children go to sleep when it’s time to sleep, and feeding routines help children eat when it’s time to eat. Serve meals and snacks at about the same times every day.

Toddlers and preschoolers can be distracted easily. Help them concentrate on eating by turning off the television during meals. Also enforce a rule against bringing reading material or toys to the table.

Don’t fall into bad routines, such as bribing your child with food. Withholding dessert sends the message that dessert is the best food. That message may increase your child’s desire for sweets above all other foods. You may, unintentionally, be implying that eating healthy foods is an unpleasant experience — one that must be endured if the child wants a reward.

Picky eating rarely persists
As children mature, they tend to become less picky about food. Still, everyone has food preferences, so no child is going to like everything. Keep things in perspective and try not to make mealtimes a battle of wills between you and your child.

Source: Mayo Clinic

Jika masih di rumah sakit, tamu yang datang menengok memang relatif lebih bisa diatur dengan adanya jam kunjungan yang sudah ditetapkan. Selain itu, bayi pun lebih banyak dirawat di kamar bayi oleh perawat. Dengan demikian, efek buruk relatif kecil. Namun bila sudah pulang ke rumah, otomatis perawatan bayi sepenuhnya ada di tangan orang tuanya. Di sisi lain, yang datang menengok pun tak bisa diatur dengan jam kunjungan, kan?

Nah, berikut ini 3 kebiasaan buruk para tamu yang mesti diwaspadai:

1. MENCIUM BAYI
Kebiasaan ini jelas tak menguntungkan si kecil. Masalahnya, bayi baru lahir memiliki imunitas atau daya tahan yang sangat lemah, karena memang pembentukan sistem kekebalannya belum selesai. Sedangkan kita tahu, banyak sekali penularan penyakit yang terjadi melalui perantaraan butiran ludah halus (droplet) yang terisap dan masuk ke saluran napas.

Hingga, bila diantara para tamu ada yang kurang sehat, semisal agak pilek sedikit, tentu si kecil bisa ikut tertular dan akhirnya sakit. Padahal kalau bayi baru lahir sakit, mudah sekali merembet ke organ lainnya.

Namun untuk melarang tamu agar tak menyentuh si kecil, tak mudah dilakukan. Salah – salah malah dianggap sombong dan tak menghargai tamu. Apa boleh buat, kita harus pintar – pintar menghadapinya. Katakan dengan sopan, sebaiknya ia tidak terlalu dekat dengan si bayi. Atau, bisa juga si ibu menyediakan masker penutup mulut dan hidung, sehingga bila si tamu tetap berkeinginan untuk berdekatan dengan si kecil, mintalah ia untuk menggunakan masker tersebut.

2. MENGGENDONG
Tak jarang si kecil jadi “piala bergilir” yang digendong sana-sini. Sebenarnya kalau pakaian yang menggendong tidak kotor, ya, tidak masalah. Namun bila si tamu habis bepergian ke tempat umum di mana-mana, tentu saja pakaiannya jadi lusuh dan kotor. Padahal saat menggendong bayi, baju yang dikenakan biasanya akan mengenai si bayi.

Selain dalam hal kebersihan, cara menggendong perlu juga diperhatikan. Kalau yang sudah punya anak, biasanya tak jadi masalah karena mereka memang punya pengalaman dan tahu cara menggendong yang benar.

Yang perlu diperhatikan, bila si penggendong belum biasa menggendong bayi baru lahir. “Ini penting, sebab leher bayi yang usianya masih di bawah 3 bulan biasanya belum sanggup menopang kepalanya sendiri. Jadi dalam menggendongnya, kepala bayi harus selalu disangga. Nah, bila si tamu tampaknya belum biasa menggendong bayi, ajarilah ia cara menggendong yang benar agar jangan sampai si kecil jadi cedera.

3. MEMEGANG-MEGANG
Hampir dipastikan para tamu berkeinginan memegang tubuh si kecil, seumpama di daerah pipi yang biasanya tampak sangat menggemaskan. Dalam hal ini, sekali lagi, kebersihan perlu diperhatikan. Jangan sampai tangan yang kotor mengenai wajah bayi yang masih lemah ini. Karena itu, ada baiknya para tamu diminta mencuci tangan dulu sebelum menyentuh bayi. Adakalanya malah berlanjut dengan cubitan kecil. Kalau yang seperti ini sebaiknya dicegah, sebab bisa jadi si kecil cedera. Bukankah kulitnya masih lembut sekali?

Mandikan Saja
Bila kita beranggapan si kecil banyak terpapar kuman atau jadi kotor lantaran telanjur dipegang-pegang, digendong, atau dicium para tamu, tak ada salahnya bila si kecil dibersihkan dengan memandikannya.

Menanggapi Komentar Tamu
Rasanya hampir selalu para tamu akan menyampaikan berbagai pesan dan komentar tentang cara merawat bayi. Terutama disampaikan oleh yang lebih tua atau sudah memiliki anak. Apa yang disampaikan seringkali terasa sangat bernuansa tradisional dan berdasarkan mitos tertentu, meski kadang ada juga yang memang berdasarkan ilmu pengetahuan modern.

Menghadapinya, gunakan akal sehat. Pada kenyataannya memang banyak mitos atau nasehat – nasehat turun – temurun yang sebenarnya tak masuk akal dan bahkan kerap merugikan. Contoh, larangan mencuci rambut atau keramas sampai 40 hari setelah melahirkan. Persis mencapai 40 hari, bisa-bisa kepalanya sudah penuh dengan kutu rambut, bahkan mungkin sudah jadi korengan, terjadi infeksi, dan kerusakan rambut.

Munculnya larangan tersebut, disebabkan zaman dulu kalau mau keramas pakai air dingin dan mungkin masih ditambah dengan ramu-ramuan sehingga proses keramas berlangsung lama dan buntutnya si ibu jadi kedinginan, lalu jatuh sakit. Nah, kalau sekarang, kan, bisa mandi dengan air hangat dan keramasnya pakai sampo, sehingga mencuci rambut bisa hanya makan waktu 10 menit saja. Tentu ini tak akan membuat sakit. Bahkan saat ini ada rumah sakit yang justru menyediakan sarana keramas atau creambath di lingkungan rumah sakit untuk pasien rawat inapnya.

Contoh lain, Ada juga yang menganjurkan untuk membalur tubuh dengan berbagai ramuan dan tak boleh dibersihkan sampai berhari-hari. Inikan malah bisa membuat sakit dermatitis kontak.

Namun demikian, tentu saja ada juga nasehat yang sebenarnya bermanfaat. Salah satu contoh, larangan untuk berjalan melangkahi sesuatu bagi ibu yang baru melahirkan. Ini sebenarnya memberikan manfaat agar ibu yang baru melahirkan tidak berjalan ke sana ke mari dengan langkah terlalu lebar, yang bisa menyebabkan luka pasca melahirkan di jalan lahir jadi tak sembuh-sembuh dan terbuka lagi.

Dalam kaitan dengan anjuran tersebut, si ibu pun kerap dianjurkan memakai kain atau gurita sampai ke lutut. Sebenarnya ini berfungsi agar langkah si ibu jadi kecil-kecil dan tak bisa terlalu lebar. Sehingga, walaupun mobilisasi sudah banyak, di antaranya harus banyak meladeni para tamu yang berdatangan menjenguk, tak sampai membuat luka terbuka kembali. Jadi sekali lagi, semua nasehat tersebut sebaiknya dipikirkan baik-baik dengan mempergunakan common sense dahulu.

Tamu Datang Mendadak
Adakalanya tamu datang mendadak dan pada saat-saat di mana si bayi harusnya disusui atau dimandikan. Tentu saja si ibu tetap harus menerima kedatangan tamu dengan cara yang sopan, bukan malah menolaknya.

Yang penting diingat, si ibu harus tegas dan jangan segan-segan mengundurkan diri sejenak demi keperluan si bayi. Umpama, kalau memang waktunya untuk menyusui atau mengganti popok, menceboki, memandikan, atau apa saja, janganlah segan-segan minta waktu pada para tamu.

Nah, selama si ibu mengurus bayi, para tamu bisa ditemani sang ayah, saudara yang ada, atau juga kakek-nenek si bayi. Tentu para tamu pun dapat memahami hal ini. Bahkan, sebenarnya kalau memang tamunya adalah saudara / kerabat yang cukup dekat, acara memandikan bayi yang sedang lucu – lucunya ini bisa menjadi tontonan tersendiri, lo. Tapi tentu saja, ini tergantung dengan si ibu, ia merasa nyaman atau tidak dengan hal ini.

Jadilah Tamu Yang Baik

Hindari berkunjung dengan cara mendadak.
Sebaiknya sebelum datang berkunjung, beri tahu dulu pada si ibu atau salah satu anggota keluarganya. Paling tidak, sampaikan rencana kunjungan melalui telepon sehari sebelumnya. Dengan demikian, si ibu dapat mengatur waktu dan mempersiapkan diri dahulu.

Hindari datang pada jam makan siang/malam.
Bila tamu datang saat jam makan, sebagai tuan rumah tentu akan merasa “harus” mengajaknya makan. Padahal, belum tentu mereka punya makanan untuk disuguhkan. Akibatnya, tuan rumah jadi kebingungan akan menyuguhkan apa pada para tamunya.

Jangan datang terlalu pagi/malam.
Biasanya pada pagi hari keluarga masih sibuk mengurus si kecil, entah memandikan atau mengelapnya. Mereka pun biasanya sedang sibuk membereskan rumah. Sebaliknya, jangan pula datang terlalu malam, sebab sudah tentu mereka butuh waktu istirahat yang lebih banyak daripada biasanya.

Hati-hati memberikan komentar mengenai sang bayi.
Adakalanya pandangan orang lain tak sama dengan pendapat kita, dan ini bisa membuat jengkel si ibu. Contoh, memberi komentar, “Wah, coba seandainya bayinya laki-laki.” Bila si ibu melahirkan anak perempuan, tentu akan merasa tak enak mendengarnya.

Jika sedang sakit, jangan dekat-dekat dengan si bayi.
Jangan sampai malah membuat si bayi sakit dengan kedatangan kita.

Beri kesempatan pada si ibu bila memang ia perlu waktu untuk merawat bayinya.
Jika memang tampaknya si ibu sedang sibuk mengurus bayinya, tak usahlah terlalu berlama-lama bertamu agar si ibu punya keleluasaan merawat bayinya.

• Sekitar umur 7 – 8 bulan bayi mulai bisa bersuara satu suku kata, misalnya: ma atau pa atau ta, atau da
• Sekitar umur 8 – 10 bulan bisa bersuara bersambung, misalnya: ma-ma-ma-ma, pa-pa-pa-pa, da-da-da-da-, ta-ta-ta-ta
• Sekitar umur 11 – 13 bulan mulai bisa memanggil : mama !, papa !
• Sekitar umur 13 – 15 bulan mulai bisa mengucapkan 1 kata, misal: mimik, minum, pipis
• Sekitar umur 15 – 17 bulan mulai bisa mengucapkan 2 kata
• Sekitar umur 16 – 18 bulan mulai bisa mengucapkan 3 kata
• Sekitar umur 19 – 22 bulan mulai bisa mengucapkan 6 kata
• Sekitar umur 23 – 26 bulan mulai bisa menggabungkan beberapa kata misal: mimik cucu
• Sekitar umur 24 – 28 bulan mulai bisa menyebutkan nama benda, gambar
• Sekitar umur 26 – 35 bulan, bicaranya 50 % dapat dimengerti orang lain

(Sumber : Denver II, Frankenburg WK dkk, 1990)

Supaya tidak terlambat berbicara, latihlah sejak bayi

Bayi sejak lahir sudah bisa mendengar dan mengerti suara manusia, terutama suara ibunya. Walaupun bayi belum bisa menjawab dengan kata-kata tetapi bayi bisa menyatakan perasaannya dengan : senyuman, gerakan bibir, bersuara, berteriak, menggerakkan tangan kaki, kepala atau dengan menangis. Dengan latihan setiap hari sejak bayi, lama kelamaan bayi dan anak dapat menjawab dengan kata-kata dan kalimat. Latihan ini sekaligus merangsang perkembangan emosi, sosial, dan perkembangan kecerdasannya. Supaya bayi atau anak anda tidak terlambat berbicara, lakukan metode ini setiap hari, ketika anda berada tidak jauh dari bayi anda.

Melatih Bayi dan Anak Berbicara

I. Berbicaralah kepada bayi / anak sebanyak mungkin dan sesering mungkin, dengan penuh kasih sayang, walaupun ia belum bisa menjawab

Bertanya pada bayi / anak.. Contoh : Adik haus, ya ? Gardi lapar, ya ?. Elta mau susu, lagi ? Ini gambar apa ? Ini boneka apa ? Ini warnanya apa ? Ini namanya siapa ?

Komentar terhadap perasaan bayi / anak . Contoh : Kasihan, adik rewel kepanasan, ya ?. Nah sekarang dikipasin ya ? Ooo, kasihan, adik rewel gatal digigit nyamuk, ya ? Jatuh ya ? Sakit , ya ? Sini di obatin !

Menyatakan perasaan ibu / ayah . Contoh : Aduh, mama kangen banget deh sama adik. Tadi mama di kantor ingat terus sama adik. Mmmh , mama sayang deh sama adik.

Komentar keadaan bayi / anak.. Contoh : Aduh pipi Ade tembem ! Wow, Rama matanya besar banget ! Wah, kepala Gardi botak ! Ai, ai, Elta buang air besar lagi !

Komentar perilaku bayi / anak Contoh : Wah, Rini sudah bisa duduk! Eeee, Tono sudah bisa berdiri ? Ai, ai, Ari sudah bisa duduk ! Wah, adik sudah bisa jalan !

Bercerita tentang benda-benda di sekitar bayi / anak : Contoh : Lihat nih. Ini namanya bantal. Warnanya merah muda, ada gambar Winnie the Pooh. Adik tahu nggak Winni the Pooh ? belum tahu ? Winni The Pooh itu beruang yang lucu dan cerdik. Nanti kalau sudah gede pasti tahu deh. Yang ini namanya boneka Teletubies. Warnanya merah. Yang ini warnanya hijau, yang itu ungu. Nih, coba di peluk.

Bercerita tentang kegiatan yang sedang dilakukan pada bayi / anak

Contoh : Adik dimandiin dulu, ya ? Pakai air hangat, pakai sabun, biar bersih, biar kumannya hilang, biar kulitnya bagus sepeti bintang film. Sekarang dihandukin biar kering, tidak kedinginan. Sudaaaaah selesai. Sekarang pakai pampers, pakai baju, dibedakin dulu, biar kulitnya halus, wangi.. Nah, selesai. Enak, kan ? Asyik, kan ? Habis ini minum ASI terus tidur, ya ? Mama mau masak, ya ?

Bercerita tentang kegiatan yang sedang dilakukan ibu : Contoh : Mama sekarang mau bikin susu buat adik sebentar , ya ? Nih, susunyal 3 takar, ditambah air 90 cc, terus dikocok-kocok. Kepanasan nggak ? Enggak kok.
Nah, siap deh.

II. Dengarkan suara bayi / anak, berikan jawaban atau pujian

Ketika bayi / anak bersuara atau berbicara (walaupun tidak jelas), segera kita menoleh dan memandang ke arah bayi dan mendengarkan suara bayi / anak seolah-olah kita mengerti maksudnya. Pandang matanya, tirukan suaranya, berikan jawaban atau pujian, seolah-olah bayi mengerti jawaban kita. Contoh : Ta-ta-ta-ta ? Ma-ma-ma-ma ? Kenapa, sayang ? Minta susu ? Mau poop ?

III. Bermain sambil berbicara

Ciluk – ba. Ibu mengucapkan ciluuuuuukk (muka ditutup bantal) beberapa detik kemudian bantal ditarik kesamping sambil ibu mengucapkan : baaaaaa !!!. Kapal terbang. Nih ada kapal terbang sedang terbang. Ngngngngngng. Ada musuh, kapal terbangnya menembak musuh … dor .. dor .. dor. Kapal terbangnya turun ke muka bayi terus keperutnya. Boneka, dimainkan seolah-olah ia berbicara kepada bayi / anak Menyebutkan nama mainan, nama makanan, anggota badan (tangan, kaki, jari-jari, mulut, mata, telinga, hidung dll.)

IV. Bernyanyi sambil bermain

Pok-ambai-ambai, belalang kupu-kupu, tepok biar ramai, pagi-pagi minum cucu. Cecak-cecak didinding, diam-diam merayap, datang seekor lalat, hap ! lalu ditangkap. Dua mata saya, hidung saya satu, (sambil menunjuk ke mata, hidung dst.) Putarkan kaset lagu anak-anak, ikut bernyanyi, sambil tepuk tangan, goyang kepala dll.

V. Membacakan cerita sambil menunjukkan gambar-gambar

Bacakan cerita singkat dari buku cerita anak yang bergambar. Tunjukkan gambar tokoh-tokoh yang ada dalam cerita (binatang, benda-benda, manusia). Tanyakan kembali apa nama benda tersebut, apa gunanya, siapa nama tokohTunjukkan gambar-gambar di dalam majalah.

VI. Menonton TV bersama anak sambil menyebutkan nama-nama benda, tokoh atau kejadian yang terlihat di TV

Itu mobil, yang itu kapal, itu sepeda. Itu kucing, di sebelahnya ada tikus dan anjing. Kucing melompat, tikus lari, anjing duduk.

VII. Banyak berbicara sepanjang jalan ketika bepergian (ke pertokoan, rumah keluarga dll)

Tunjuklah benda-benda atau kejadian sambil menyebutkan dengan kata-kata berulang-ulang. Itu layang-layang sedang terbang, itu kakak sedang menyeberang jalan, itu burung sedang terbang, itu pohon ada bunganya, itu boneka pakai kacamata dll.

VIII. Bermain dengan anak lain yang lebih jelas dan lancar berbicaranya

Ajak bermain dengan anak lain (kakak, tetangga, sepupu) yang sudah lebih jelas berbicaranya, bermain bersama menggunakan boneka, kubus, balok, puzzle, Lego, gambar-gambar, buku bergambar dll.

PERHATIAN

• Jangan memaksa anak berbicara.
• Kalau bayi / anak bersuara (walaupun tidak jelas) berikan jawaban, seolah-olah kita mengerti ucapannya
• Pujilah segera kalau dia berbicara benar.
• Jangan menyalahkan anak kalau ia salah mengucapkannya
• Kalau anak sudah bosan sebaiknya beralih ke kegiatan lain

Latihan – latihan ini selain merangsang berbicara sekaligus merangsang perkembangan emosi, sosial, dan perkembangan kognitif (kecerdasan).

Begitu turun dari mobil, Ardi seperti terkesima melihat sesuatu di pintu masuk. Ketika mencium jenazah neneknya, tiba-tiba ia kembali menutupi telinganya dan tampak ketakutan. Pandangannya terus menuju ke luar pintu. Setelah itu Ardi mengatakan kepalanya sakit, dan tidak ikut ke makam.

Menjelang tengah malam, Ardi menanyakan apakah ibunya mendengar suara petir siang tadi. Sang ibu menjawab, “Tidak.” “Masak Mama enggak dengar, kan keras sekali dan terus- terusan, Ma,” kata Dewi menirukan ucapan Ardi saat itu. “Sehabis itu Ardi menceritakan semuanya,” lanjut Dewi. Selain petir, Ardi melihat burung besar di pintu rumah sang nenek. “Burung itu enggak pergi-pergi,” ujar Ardi seperti ditirukan Dewi.

Saat mencium neneknya, Ardi melihat sang nenek berjalan menuju sebuah gerbang. Saat itu Ardi mendengar suara petir lagi, yang lebih keras dari sebelumnya, dan ia menyaksikan neneknya melangkah melewati gerbang, terus berjalan menuju tempat yang ia katakan “indah sekali”.

Peristiwa itu bukan yang pertama, sehingga Dewi dan suaminya tidak lagi terkejut mendengar penuturan anak mereka. “Dia sering melihat macam- macam, tetapi biasanya diam. Ia hanya mau berbicara sesudahnya, pelan-pelan dan hanya kepada orang tertentu,” sambung Dewi.

Usia Ardi kini menjelang 10 tahun. Di sekolah ia termasuk cerdas. IQ-nya antara 125-130. “Tapi gurunya bilang ia suka bengong di kelas,” sambung Dewi. Kepada ibunya, ia bercerita melihat macam-macam di sekolah, yang tidak bisa dilihat orang lain, di antaranya anak tanpa anggota badan, dan ia merasa sangat kasihan.

Suatu hari saat belajar di rumah ia tersenyum. Ketika ditanya oleh sang ibu, ia mengatakan ada anak persis sekali dengan dirinya. Hari berikutnya ia bercerita, anak itu datang di sekolahnya. Ketika ditanya di mana ia tinggal, anak itu menjawab, “Di sana,” sambil telunjuknya menunjuk ke arah atas. “Ada apa di sana?” tanya Ardi. Anak itu menjawab, “Ada orang gede- gede buanget. Anak itu omongnya juga medhok lho Ma, kayak aku, persis,” tutur Ardi seperti diceritakan kembali oleh Dewi. Tentu tak ada orang lain melihat “anak itu” kecuali Ardi.

Dewi dan suaminya memahami apa yang terjadi pada Ardi dan juga adiknya. Beberapa anggota keluarganya juga memiliki kepekaan lebih dibandingkan dengan orang kebanyakan. Pada Ardi hal itu sudah terdeteksi saat masih bayi. “Kalau dengar suara azan, Ardi tampak mendengarkan dengan penuh konsentrasi,” kenang Dewi. Menjelang usia 1,5 tahun, Ardi membaca kalimat syahadat secara sambung-menyambung seperti wirid. Sesudah bisa jalan, sebelum usia dua tahun, ia mulai mengambil sajadah sendiri, memakai sarung sendiri dan membuat gerakan seperti orang shalat, meskipun bukan waktu shalat.

Toh tingkah laku Ardi membuat Dewi merasa agak risau. “Ia melihat dan mendengar apa saja yang orang lain enggak bisa lihat dan enggak bisa dengar,” katanya. Ia tidak menceritakan situasi anaknya itu pada setiap orang di luar keluarga. “Kalau enggak percaya bisa-bisa anak itu dianggap berkhayal,” lanjutnya.

Dewi tidak mengecap anaknya berkhayal, karena dalam beberapa hal ia juga memiliki kepekaan itu, meski hanya sampai tingkat tertentu. “Suatu sore, sehabis shalat, saya merasa ada bayangan putih. Ardi rupanya juga melihat karena ia tersenyum. Dia bilang, ‘Ma, ada yang ngikutin, perempuan. Tapi orangnya baik sekali.’ Ketika saya tanya siapa, Ardi tidak menjawab.”

Suatu hari, Dewi membaca majalah yang menulis tentang tanda-tanda anak indigo. “Lha saya pikir kok persis sekali sama anak saya. Lalu saya berusaha menemui dr Erwin di Klinik Prorevital.”

Anak – anak dengan kemampuan seperti Ardi bukan hal yang baru di dunia, tetapi fenomenanya semakin jelas 20 tahun terakhir ini. Beberapa film mengisahkan kemampuan anak dan manusia dewasa dengan kemampuan semacam itu, di antaranya The Sixth Sense, dan film-film seri seperti The X Files.

Menurut dr Tubagus Erwin Kusuma SpKj, psikiater yang menaruh perhatian pada masalah spiritualitas, anak-anak seperti itu semakin muncul di mana-mana di dunia, melewati batas budaya, agama, suku, etnis, kelompok, dan batas apa pun yang dibuat manusia untuk alasan-alasan tertentu.

Fenomena itu menarik perhatian banyak pihak, karena dalam paradigma psikologi manusia, anak-anak itu dianggap “aneh”. Pandangan ini muncul karena selama ini kemanusiaan telanjur dianggap sebagai hal yang statis, tak pernah berubah. “Padahal, semua ciptaan Tuhan selalu berubah,” ujar dr Erwin.

Sebagai hukum, masyarakat cenderung memahami evolusi tapi hanya untuk yang berkaitan dengan masa lalu. “Fenomena munculnya anak-anak dengan kemampuan seperti itu merupakan bagian dari evolusi kesadaran baru manusia, yang secara perlahan muncul di bumi, terutama sejak awal milenium spiritual sekitar tahun 2000 yang disebut Masa Baru, The New Age, atau The Aquarian Age. Semua ini merupakan wujud kebesaran Allah,” tegas Erwin.

Fisik anak-anak indigo sama dengan anak-anak lainnya, tetapi batinnya tua (old soul) sehingga tak jarang memperlihatkan sifat orang yang sudah dewasa atau tua. Sering kali ia tak mau diperlakukan seperti anak kecil dan tak mau mengikuti tata cara maupun prosedur yang ada. Kebanyakan anak indigo juga memiliki indra keenam yang lebih kuat dibanding orang biasa. Kecerdasannya di atas rata-rata.

Istilah “indigo” berasal dari bahasa Spanyol yang berarti nila. Warna ini merupakan kombinasi biru dan ungu, diidentifikasi melalui cakra tubuh yang memiliki spektrum warna pelangi, dari merah sampai ungu. Istilah “anak indigo” atau indigo children juga merupakan istilah baru yang ditemukan konselor terkemuka di AS, Nancy Ann Tappe.

Pada pertengahan tahun 1970-an Nancy meneliti warna aura manusia dan memetakan artinya untuk menandai kepribadiannya. Tahun 1982 ia menulis buku Understanding Your Life Through Color. Penelitian lanjutan untuk mengelompokkan pola dasar perangai manusia melalui warna aura mendapat dukungan psikiater Dr McGreggor di San Diego University.

Dalam klasifikasi yang baru itu Nancy membahas warna nila yang muncul kuat pada hampir 80 persen aura anak-anak yang lahir setelah tahun 1980. Warna itu menempati urutan keenam pada spektrum warna pelangi maupun pada deretan vertikal cakra, dalam bahasa Sansekerta disebut cakra ajna, yang terletak di dahi, di antara dua alis mata.

“Itulah mata ketiga,” ujar dr Erwin. The third eye itu, menurut dia, berkaitan dengan hormon hipofisis (pituary body) dan hormon epificis (pineal body) di otak. Dalam peta klasifikasi yang dibuat Nancy, manusia dengan aura dominan nila dikategorikan sebagai manusia dengan intuisi dan imajinasi sangat kuat.

“Letak indigo ada di sini,” jelas Tommy Suhalim sambil menjalankan perangkat teknologi pembaca aura, aura video station (AVS). Alat yang protipenya dibuat oleh Johannes R Fisslinger dari Jerman tahun 1997 ini lebih canggih dibandingkan perangkat teknologi serupa yang ditemukan Seymon Kirlian tahun 1939, dan Aura Camera 6000 yang dibuat Guy Coggins tahun 1992 berdasarkan Kirlian Photography.

Tom menunjukkan titik berkedip berwarna nila tua, sangat jelas di antara kedua mata Vincent Liong (19). Murid kelas dua tingkat SLTA di Gandhi International School itu sudah menulis buku pada usia 14 tahun dan bukunya diterbitkan oleh penerbit terkemuka di Indonesia. Buku Berlindung di Bawah Payung itu merupakan refleksi, berdasarkan kejadian sehari- hari yang sangat sederhana.

Pergulatan pemikiran yang muncul dalam tulisan-tulisannya kemudian seperti datang dari pemikiran orang bijak, dan menjadi bahan pembicaraan. Pemilihan angle-nya tidak biasa, dan hampir tidak terpikir bahkan oleh orang dewasa yang menekuni bidang itu. Belakangan ia banyak menulis soal spiritual, namun tetap dilihat dalam konteks ilmiah dan rasional.

Mungkin karena minatnya yang sangat besar pada dunia tulis-menulis, Vincent tidak terlalu berminat dengan beberapa mata pelajaran di sekolahnya. Orangtuanya yang tergolong demokratis pun sering tidak mengerti apa yang diingini anaknya yang ber-IQ antara 125-130 ini. “Dia keras kepala. Kemarin ia tidak mau ikut ujian matematika,” sambung Liong, ayahnya.

Vincent mengaku “takut” pada matematika sejak kecil, tapi mengaku disiplin pada aturan mainnya sendiri. “Sejak kecil aku bingung pada dogma satu tambah satu sama dengan dua. Aku juga bingung dengan ilmu ekonomi karena dalam realitas sosial berbeda,” tegas Vincent.

Toh sang ibu sudah menengarai keistimewaan anaknya sejak bayi. Waktu SD, Vincent biasa bergaul dengan gurunya, dan orang-orang setua gurunya. Pertanyaannya banyak dan sangat kritis. “Saya langganan dipanggil guru bukan hanya karena anak itu sulit. tetapi juga karena karangan-karangannya membuat guru-gurunya kagum,” ujar Ny Ina.

Vincent sudah menulis tentang teleskop berdasarkan pengamatan dan referensi pada usia SD. “Di rumah ia membawa ensiklopedi yang besar- besar itu ke kamarnya,” ujar Ny Ina. “Kamarnya kayak kapal pecah. Tidurnya dini hari karena menulis,” sambung Liong. “Saya sering meminta agar ia menyelesaikan pendidikan formalnya dulu, karena bagaimanapun itu sangat penting,” lanjut Liong.

“Pendidikan formal sangat penting karena anak-anak indigo harus membumikan ‘ilmu langitnya’ untuk kebaikan manusia. Bukan sebaliknya,” ujar Rosini (40). Ia menganjurkan, agar anak-anak yang memiliki kemampuan berbeda itu tidak dieksploitasi oleh orangtua dan lingkungannya untuk mencari nomor togel atau menjadi dukun atau klenik. “Bukan itu misi anak-anak indigo,” tegas Rosi.

Anak-anak itu sebenarnya punya mekanisme pertahanannya sendiri. Annisa, misalnya. Gadis kecil berusia 4,5 tahun ini tiba-tiba berbicara dalam bahasa Inggris beraksen Amerika begitu ia bisa bicara pada usia 2,5 tahun. Padahal orangtuanya tidak berbahasa Inggris dengan baik. Meski tampak menggemaskan, dalam banyak hal ia berbicara dan bersikap seperti orang dewasa, bahkan menyebut dirinya “orang Amerika” karena “datang dari Amerika”. Nisa menyebut ibunya, Yenny bukan dengan panggilan mama.

Kemampuan melihat dan mendengar Nisa sangat tajam pada pukul 23.00 sampai dini hari. Tetapi kalau secara sengaja diminta memperlihatkan kemampuannya, ia akan menolak dengan tidak memperlihatkan kemampuan itu sehingga ia tampak seperti anak-anak lainnya,” ujar Yenny. Kata sang ibu, Nisa tidak mudah bersalaman dengan orang. Ia seperti tahu orang yang suka pergi ke dukun atau memakai jimat. Namun sebagai anak-anak Nisa juga suka menyanyi dan bermain.

Jenis dan kemampuan anak indigo bermacam-macam. Meski memiliki kepekaan yang kuat, kepekaan mendengar dan melihat sesuatu yang tidak didengar dan dilihat orang kebanyakan, berbeda-beda gradasinya.

Menurut Lanny Kuswandi, fasilitator program relaksasi di Klinik Prorevital, mengutip dr Erwin, “Ada tipe humanis, tipe konseptual, tipe artis, dan tipe interdimensional. Pendekatan terhadap mereka juga berbeda-beda,” sambungnya.

Namun karena dianggap “aneh”, tak jarang diagnosisnya keliru dan penanganannya lebih bersandar pada obat-obatan. “Ada anak indigo yang dianggap autis, ADHD (Attention-Deficit Hyperatictve Disorder) maupun ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder). Padahal tanda-tandanya berbeda,” sambung Erwin. Kekeliruan semacam ini juga terjadi di AS, karena banyak ahli menganggap anak-anak itu menderita “gangguan” yang harus dihilangkan.

“Saya beberapa kali pergi ke psikolog dan psikiater,” ujar Rosini. Profesional di suatu perusahaan swasta terkemuka itu suatu saat dalam hidupnya merasa sangat terganggu oleh suara-suara itu. Orangtuanya juga merasa anaknya “aneh” karena kerap memberi tahu peristiwa yang akan terjadi, tetapi menolak mengakui kemampuan anak itu.

“Dalam tes yang dibuat oleh mereka, saya dinyatakan sehat. Tidak ada gangguan apa pun,” sambung Rosini. Sebaliknya, ia melihat psikolog dan psikiater yang melakukan tes terhadap dirinyalah yang bermasalah. Ia juga pernah mencoba mencari paranormal untuk membuang kemampuannya itu, meski suara-suara itu mengatakan “jangan”.

Akhirnya Rosi berdamai dengan dirinya dan mengembalikan kemampuannya sebagai wujud kebesaran Allah SWT, dengan berusaha untuk terus mendekatkan diri pada Sang Pencipta. Karena itu ia ingin membantu orangtua dengan anak-anak indigo agar anak- anak itu tidak melewati masa pencarian yang rumit seperti dirinya.

Indigo children, menurut Erwin, bukan fenomena terakhir, karena akan lahir anak-anak yang disebut sebagai crystal children. “Anak-anak dengan warna dasar aura, bening dan lengkap. Mereka lahir dari orangtua yang spiritual.”

Mungkin Cita (9) termasuk anak itu. Keluarganya, sampai nenek-neneknya, spiritualis. Ia bisa melihat sinar dan malaikat di rumah ibadah, khususnya ketika orang-orang sedang berdoa. Ini hanya salah satu kemampuan “melihat” milik anak yang selalu mendapat rangking di sekolah itu. Cita tahu kapan hujan akan turun hari itu dan sebaliknya, meskipun mendung sudah menggantung.

“Ia menjadi teman dan penasihat kami, bapak-ibunya. Di sekolah, di keluarga besar kami, terasa ia menebarkan aura kedamaian dan kebahagiaan. Anak itu sangat tenang dan pemaaf,” ujar ibunya, Ny Dita.

 
Eight Week Fetus

All the major organs of your baby have formed now though they are not fully developed yet. Eyes and ears are growing now. The heart is beating strongly. When you have an ultrasound during this time, you can see the fetal heart pulsating.

Twelve Week Fetus

Your baby is now about 6.5 cm long and weighs about 18 grams. His head is becoming more rounded and the face is completely formed. Toes and fingers are formed and nails are beginning to grow. The baby is moving it’s limps but you can not feel this movements yet.

Sixteen Week Fetus

Your baby is now about 16 cm long and weighs 35 grams. During a scan, you can see the baby’s head and body and you may see the baby moving. It is exercising all his limbs, kicking and moving about. This is the earliest stage at which you may feel the baby moving. It feels like there is a butterfly in your belly. However, do not worry if you don’t feel anything yet. If this is your first baby, you are likely to feel the first movements a bit later.

Twenty Week Fetus

The baby is still swimming around in a large amount of amniotic fluid. He is growing rapidly, both in length and weight and is now 25 cm long, half as long as it will be at delivery and weighs about 340 grams. It makes some very active movements that can be felt by you. You will probably notice that there are times when your baby seems to be asleep and other times when he’s moving about a lot.

Twenty Four Week Fetus

Your baby is about 32 cm long now and weighs 500 grams. You can feel different parts of the baby’s body through your abdominal wall. Your uterine muscle is stretching and you may feel a pain sometimes at the side of your tummy. The top of your uterus reaches to just above your navel.

Thirty Week Fetus

Your baby’s head is now in proportion with the rest of his body. You may feel pressure on your diaphragm, stomach and intestines.Your baby’s weight is now about 1700 grams or three pounds eleven ounces and measures about 40 cm or 15.8 inches in length.

Thirty Six Week Fetus

Your baby is almost fully mature. Any time now he may descend into your pelvis. Once the baby has engaged you may find that your breathing becomes easier and the pressure on your diaphragm is less. Your baby’s skin is smooth now and his body has plumped out. When the baby is awake his eyes are open and he can differentiate between light and dark. Your baby is now about 50 cm long and weighs anywhere from 2500 to 4500 grams.

Thirty Seven Week Baby to Forty Two Week Baby

Any day now your labor may start. Do not worry if your baby is not born exactly on his due date. The due date is only a statistic means. Only 5 % of the babies are born exactly on their due dates. The long awaited day is near and soon you will be holding your baby in your arms. Your baby has lost his lanugo hair although you may still find some at his back and on his forehead. Your baby’s eyes will be blue at birth but this can change in the weeks to come. Some babies arrive a bit earlier, others a bit later, but they do arrive! So, much luck and happiness with the new baby in your life!